Wednesday, August 31, 2011

Irrational Fears

Fact: I'm scared of extremely stupid things.

This is a rather embarrassing fact about myself. Generally, I'm not scared of anything, and I mean anything. Trying gross foods? No problem. Creepy crawly/intimidating critters that fall into the "more scared of you than you are of them" category, like spiders, snakes, Grizzly bears or sharks? Bring it on. Even dangerous stunts, like skydiving or bungee jumping don't phase me.

But everyone has a few random strange fears. My boyfriend is convinced Bigfoot lives less than a mile from us, and a friend of his avoids sleeping over at our house because he thinks one of my cats is going to scratch his face off in the middle of the night. He'll pet them during the day, but for some reason as soon as the sun goes down he thinks they become rabid little beasts, like gremlins or something. As for myself, well, I admit I have a few unbelievably ridiculous things that terrify me. So here they are now:

My Top 3 Irrational Fears

3.) Being stranded in a car in 100 degree weather with no air conditioning or cracked windows. When I get into a car, I literally have to check to make sure there are no child locks so if there were a dramatic spike in temperature I'd still have a way out. I've had panic attacks over windows that have a slight delay before they roll down. I'm not kidding, folks. Heat + small space + no relief = instant crazy person.

2.) The old Burger King mascot. It's a guy in a king costume with a plastic face that hands out burgers. Come on people, it's one step away from a homicidal clown that hands out balloons and then follows you home and kills you in your sleep.

1.) People on television who seem to be speaking directly to me. For example, there's this new internet and cable company in Montana called Optimum. The main guy on all their commercials freaks me the hell out. He talks about how Optimum is here to serve me, then looks into my eyes and says, "In the coming weeks, I'll be back with more information." Except I hear, "In the coming weeks I'll slowly find my way to your house, and then one morning you'll walk out of your bedroom to find me sitting on your couch, wearing your high heels and holding a steak knife." I don't want him to be back. I want him to leave me alone and stop staring at me. If I ever actually see him in real life I'll genuinely think he's stalking me. I think he's stalking me right now, actually...creepy, creepy, Optimum commercial man...

So I'm sure there are a few more, but these are the basic ones. What are some of your irrational fears?

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  1. *snicker* I needed that, thank you!

    Irrational fears? I don't really have any. I'm more afraid of real things... that I do... because I'm clumsy & have bad luck. You know.. falling UP the stairs, boogers in my nose, that kinda thing.
    New follower from I ♥ Blogging Hop

  2. Well...I have this fear of going backwards! HAHAHA! Like on roller coasters ya know? I don't know why but I always get anxiety like crazy if I know a ride is going to take me backwards. It freaks me out!

    Enjoyed this very much by the way-very great to start my Wednesday with it!

  3. Black toilet seats -_-

  4. Good old irrational fears. I am HORRIFIED of hills. And closeups of eyes.

  5. I afraid of those little corns that they put in Chinese food! For some reason the totally scare "the you know what out of me!" Talk about irrational!

  6. Ventriloquist dummies and wax mannequins. Those, to me, are pure Hell.

  7. I'm currently in the middle of class doing some sneaky blog reading and I almost hurt myself trying to keep my laughter contained. Another super fantastic post.

  8. Your blog is so cute! I'm following you! Please follow me back at:

    XoXo Romanian Princess

  9. I'm not a fan of the Burger King guy either. He gives me the creeps!

  10. I HATE the King. I've not been to a Burger King since the company adopted it as a commercial mascot. I did hear on the news recently that that hideous creature is being retired. Best news I've heard in a long time.

    For me... long bridges. I even purchased a special tool that breaks tempered auto glass and cuts seats belts... you know, just in case I drive off the side of the bridge.

    (stopping by from Thoughtful Thursday Hop)

  11. I am terrified of deer.
    My husband is terrified of clowns.

    I just realized how much that says about us...

  12. Hello, I'm following ya officially from Terrific Thursday.. Lovely blog you have here.Can't wait to read more.. Hope you can stop by & visit me sometime / follow back.. TY So much.. Have a great week.Marilyn from

  13. Burger King mascot is seriously creepy. I had a co-worker who had a fear of objects that had repeating 3-D patterns, like mushrooms - you know, the underside where it's repeating folds? And honeycombs and things like that. Not only did they freak her out, but apparently it ran in her family!

  14. Hi - I found you on thoughtful Thursday. Let's see - irrational fears - definitely hate the Burger King guy and snakes in toilets. But my worst is sitting on the toilet and I fear there is a spider under the seat that is gonna bite my butt and it's like a bad spider and I get that skin eating disease and... well now I'm really freaked out.

    Glad I think to have found you. Follow me back at

  15. Irrational fears? None. I'm afraid of spiders, and they are upset because of that, but there is a theory based on archeological research suggesting that eons ago spiders were the size of large dogs (or small ponies) and arachnophobia is a left-over from people being afraid for reasonable reasons. ^^

    I've got a solution for your #3 fear: Put a small hammer in your purse, the kind they've got in public busses so you can break the windows in case of emergency. ^^


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