How Do You Know It's Been A Long Day?

Ever walk out to your car to find the driver's door open and the car still running? From when you parked it this morning? 8 hours ago? No? Er, um, yeah...me neither.

Ok slight confession...I have done that. Twice.

Such is the life of a struggling grad student. I'm often exhausted, and while I may be good at hiding it most of the time, signs eventually begin to seep out; I'll nod off during lecture, forget to drop off the rent, or leave my headlights on while stopping by the bank. Soon though, it worsens. It'll take me 2 hours of wondering why the hell the chicken is taking so damn long before I think to turn the oven on, or I'll find myself driving the wrong direction down a one-way street. By the end of the week, I'll drag myself through the door, curl up on the couch, realize I haven't worn a bra all day and then scornfully ask my cat when she's planning on getting an effin' job.

Since my smug cat is unlikely to get a job in the next couple days, I fear I must keep plugging away at my current pace. I also understand that while the "I'll sleep when it's done mentality" serves me well in many instances, it can also put me in a fairly unproductive mood. Although this isn't known to last long (I usually cross over into "slap happy" territory fairly quickly), there tends to be some tell tales signs that I'd be better off going to bed:

1.) My homework assignments become riddled with whatever dialogue is on the television. I'm not sure how this happens, but if I'm writing a paper while I'm tired, I have to make sure to proofread it the next day. If I don't? I end up turning in a paper with sentences that read like this, "The participants of this study were 306 females ages 14 to 19 (M = 15.7) with hair so real you can touch it." Apparently, in this case, a Bosley hair restoration commercial was playing in the background. My professor just circled the last part and wrote a question mark above it. Nice. 

2.) My vocabulary completely goes out the window. Anytime I can't think of a word, any word, it gets replaced with some kind of profanity. Soon I'm spouting off sentences that sound like they belong in a conversation being had by a group of angry Boston men watching a Yankee game. And if I'm too tired to think of a replacement swear word? I make one up. I guess you could say it's my purest form of creativity.

3.) I want to hold one of our cats. I'll chase them around the house like a 2-year old trying to pet one. I'll catch one, they'll purr, then they'll leave. And then I am sad. So I go find another one. It's a vicious cycle.

4.) I think everything, everything is hilarious. There was a commercial running on TV last night (not sure what the product was) but the wife said something about how onions are used to keep away vampires. Her husband, who's clearly a vampire, turned to her and said, "No dear, I think you mean garlic." She looked at him like he was a complete idiot and said, "No, it's onions."  I laughed for a good 20 minutes. I was crying. Ah man, good stuff.  

5.) I have the uncontrollable urge to dance. Don't ask me why. I think I'm funny, and I'm probably not. I'll go to the kitchen to get a cup of water, and never make it back. My boyfriend will turn to see what I'm doing and there I am, hanging out in the kitchen, just a dancin' the night away.

Well folks, tonight is one of those nights. It's taken me much longer than usual to write this post because of the sheer number of typing errors I keep making. But here I am, laying in bed, my boyfriend to my right and a cat to my left, fighting back a slight case of the giggles. Yes, it is definitely bed time.

How do you know you've crossed the line into complete exhaustion?