Ahh yes, the weight loss issue. I've been there myself, along with
every single person I have ever known. So I'm not sure why I was surprised to find so many blogs dedicated to documenting weight loss that are instead being used to document frustration.
As a graduate student studying to become a Nutritional Counselor, this intrigues me because it's right up my alley. Working with clients with food addictions, over-eating disorders, or just plain trouble losing weight is what I want to do for a living. Therefore, I thought I might share some things I have learned so far that might help people approach the concept of weight loss from a different, psychological, perspective.
1.) Understand the concept of willpower.
Willpower, contrary to popular belief, is not something we are all born with, it is a skill that needs to be learned and developed, just like reading or writing. What do you think would happen if you handed someone who barely knows their ABC's a 600 page novel and demanded it be read by the end of the week? Personally, I would probably start off incredibly motivated, put all my effort into the first page, end up getting frustrated by day 6, and then ultimately resort to setting the book on fire.
Sound familiar?
Point is, there's a probable chance of failure right from the beginning.
Yet this is how many people approach the lifestyle change of healthy eating. They say, "No more fast food for me, I'm going to do it this time!" or "No more carbs, no more sugar: that's what Jessica Alba did for bikini season!" And does it ever work?
Really?
No, and you know why? Because you're attempting to read a novel before learning your ABC's. You have to build your abilities from the beginning, which brings me to point number 2:
2.) Stop and think.
Why are you eating? Is it because you're hungry? Or is it because you're bored, tired, upset, or lonely? Since you now know willpower is a skill, treat it like one.
What happens to your ability to concentrate when you're tired? Your driving skills? Any skills? They suffer. Willpower is no different. It takes practice to get good at it. Ever wonder why there's infinitely more advertisements for junk food at night rather than in the morning? Simple: people are tired after a full days work, so their willpower is more likely to falter. It's more effective to advertise crap food when peoples' guards are down. Try and recognize when this happens to you.
One strategy is to think of your body like a spoiled child, and your mind as the parent:
Body: Ooooh french fries! I want some french fries!
Mind: No, you just had potato chips, and you have dinner waiting for you when you get home. You don't need any french fries.
Body: But I want some! Potato chips were such a long time ago! I promise I'll behave myself when I get home, I promise!
Mind: No. Last time you said you would behave yourself and instead you ate a pint of Rocky Road.
Body: But I want some! Last time I promise!
Mind: I said no...
Body: Pleeeeeease? Please please please please...
Mind: I said no!
Body: Pleeeeeease please please please please!! I'll be good I promise please please pleasepleasepleaseplease....
Mind: Fine! Have the damn french fries just shut up already.
See what I mean?
Basically, your body gets what it wants by wearing you down, much like a toddler throwing a temper tantrum. So step 3:
3.) Start slowly, very slowly.
During my coursework I've learned there is no such thing as breaking a bad habit, there is only creating a new,
stronger habit to replace it, and it takes roughly 3 weeks for any habit to become fairly routine. The hardest part about forming a new habit? Your body is going to fight you tooth and nail on
every decision you make. Why? Because it's different and therefore, it's
uncomfortable, and your body HATES being uncomfortable.
So the key here is tricking yourself into thinking it's not really missing out.
So start small. Put a tablespoon less of sugar in your coffee. Instead of eating your morning bagel and cream cheese, eat a banana and then only half the bagel and cream cheese. Make this one small change until it becomes a habit, and then move onto the next one. Keeping the changes small will ensure your body doesn't feel too uncomfortable, so it won't resist as much. Too many changes at once make for a very frustrating 3 weeks. This brings me to step 4:
4.) Read the labels.
In the very beginning, don't worry yourself about the percentages of carbs, protein, and fats; that's for later when you're running marathons and saving the world. Early on, it's more important to look at things like sugar content, sodium levels, or calories. It's about making small changes. Go from white bread to wheat bread, and then to a different wheat bread with more fiber, and then to a different one with less sugar. Someday, it will be second nature to choose healthier foods, which brings me to step 5:
5.) Document your behaviors.
Yes, it is extremely useful to document what you eat, what time you ate it, and how you felt when you ate it. You should absolutely document all of this as much as possible, but it may be even more useful to document your behaviors.
It's all a part of that habit formation. Write down when you choose vegetable soup instead of cream of potato, or when you choose a yogurt containing less sugar. Write down when you take the stairs instead of the elevator, or just how often you go to the gym, not necessarily what you do there. This will get you into a habit of being mindful of your decisions instead of simply coasting through your day reacting to your body's temper tantrums.
This also creates a situation of two habits reinforcing each other. Writing down all of your good decisions makes you feel good, which subsequently makes you want to make good decisions the next day so you can write them down. It's a cycle of positive reinforcement. This leads me to step 6:
6.) Plan ahead.
We eat what we see, it's that simple. Why do you think every restaurant that offers chicken wings as an appetizer has a picture of them on the menu? Because they are the food with the highest profit ratio. They're incredibly cheap to make, and are therefore the most profitable. A picture dramatically increases the chances of them being ordered. That's why it's there.
So plan ahead. Have a strategy before eating at a restaurant and stick to it. If you plan on ordering a salad, open the menu and only look at the salads.
Bring a lunch to work, as well as a preemptive strike for those morning meetings. Are you eating the donut because you're hungry or because you just want anything to eat during the hour long meeting and donuts are the only option? If it's because they're the only option, bring another option. Bring a granola bar and eat it slowly.
At home, pre-cut and pre-package fruits and vegetables, putting them at easy reach when you're rushed or hungry. Plan your meals throughout the week. This puts you one step ahead of the game.
7.) Be clever.
Go back to the metaphor of your body being a spoiled child and your mind being a parent. What's one of the oldest scams in the book when a spoiled kid wants something and won't shut up? Trick 'em.
Take the old peanut butter issue. Peanut butter on bananas, apples, or celery is a great snack in between meals. Thing is, if you're like me, you end up eating a scoop of peanut butter per bite of banana, which adds up to some serious caloric intake. So trick yourself.
I've found if you heat a tablespoon of peanut butter in the microwave for about 15ish seconds, it melts into more of a syrup. So cut the banana into bites and dip it into the peanut butter. You end up eating considerably less peanut butter per bite of banana, and your body doesn't know the difference. It just knows it's eating a bite of banana that is absolutely smothered in peanut butter. Win-win.
8.) Set a goal.
Something realistic and well-defined. You're not going to wake up tomorrow, run 6 miles, and then do it again all week. Walk half a mile and make a homemade smoothie instead of a store bought sugar laden one. It all adds up.
9.) Find a support system.
Even if you feel completely on your own, there is someone else out there, somewhere, going through the same thing. Hell even a community of bloggers will provide a sense of support!
10.) Take it easy on yourself.
You are most likely your harshest critic. Try to keep that voice in check. Write down the sentences you say to yourself and then come back when you're ready to look at them objectively. Would you ever say to your friends the negative things you say to yourself? Would you ever let your friends say those things to you? Probably not.
Work at this to understand the difference between when that little voice is being constructive and when it's being downright abusive. Just being able to identify it is the first step to changing what it's saying.
In closing I leave you with this: there is no such thing as a diet, there is either healthy eating or nothing.
Anything extreme (cutting all carbs, cutting all sugar, no solid foods) is sure to backfire because it's unrealistic. Anything that does the work for you (Nutrisystem) will leave you frustrated, dependent, and broke (think give a man a fish vs teach a man to fish). And anything describing foods you can't eat one week but can another week (Pure Protein) is, sorry to say, complete horsesh*t. All that weight you lose in the first week? Water weight.
So start slow, and create healthy habits that will become second nature. It takes time, but it's worth it!
And you can do it!!
