Friday, October 7, 2011

Nightshift vs Dayshift

Fun fact: I'm a nightshifter. At a psychiatric hospital.

As in I work nightshifts...not some mythological shape-shifter super hero...although that sounds way more awesome...

But there’s a number of reasons why working nights is better for me: I get paid more, and by nature staying up all night just comes much more naturally than staying up all day. Plus there's a definite personality shift from day staff to night staff, and I fall into the latter.

So here we go:

5 Reasons Why Night Staff is Better than Day Staff:

1.) Night staff gets my sense of humor.

Day shift:

Nurse on lunch break holding an apple: "Oh darn, I forgot to wash my apple this morning."
Me on lunch break holding an apple: "Oh too."
I take a bite.
Nurse: "Wait, aren't you worried about eating a dirty apple?"
Me: "Nah, I'm more worried about the meth I did this morning."


Example #2:

Nurse #1: "Oh look, we're getting a patient named Heaven."
Nurse #2: "That's such an interesting name, I haven't heard that before."
Me: "That's totally my stripper name."


For the record, I do not do meth and I'm also not a stripper. Night staff laughs at that stuff. Point: nights.

2.) Night staff are as close to vampires as you'll get.

Night staff has no one to impress. We also shriek in the morning when people turn on the lights, and we walk to our cars in awe of this strange thing called "sunlight". Point: nights.

3.) We make better coffee.

Please, point: nights.

4.) Night staff are better at their jobs.

Yes, this is a stretch, but I'm going to say it. See, at a psych hospital, we are a part of the "real" hospital, so therefore we have to follow all staffing orders that are hospital wide. To save money, the hospital staffs short on nights. For the rest of the hospital it makes sense. People are sleeping at night. But in psych....oh honey...

People don't sleep in psych. They are always awake. When you tell someone it's bedtime, there's a good chance they will tell you that they are an orange and you are a carrot and as such they have superiority over you. There's really no way to argue with that.

Therefore, nightshift has to do the same jobs dayshift does, except with considerably less people. Point: nights.

5.) We look out for each other.

There's a million people to fill in for days. But nights? Hardly anyone. If we're short there's a list of about 6 people we can call, and we all know it. Dayshift has the luxury of not coming in for any extra shifts because most likely someone else will cover it. Nights? Not so much. You get called you come to work. There's no one else to call.

There. I've vented and now I feel better. Also I'm going to bed now.


  1. you make me think about (eventually) working nights... how have you adjusted sleep wise?

  2. I worked night shift for 8 years and loved it.

  3. When it comes to night shift at hospitals nurses are the best. You are awesome!

  4. I admire nightshift people. I wouldn't be able to function like that :)

  5. You are funny! I like you. I live in a town full of strippers, meth-heads and swingers. They would TOTALLY laugh at your jokes! ;)

    But nightshift SUCKS, doesn't it? To sleep during the day, you have to put up black trash bags (or something equivalent) and remember to turn off the phone so the telemarketers don't wake you up, right?

    Bless you!

    Stopping by via Boobies~ Have a great weekend!

  6. You made nights sound pretty awesome. But as much of a night owl as I am, I've never quite made the shift to being a fully on night person. I really admire you for working nights and in a psych ward no less!

  7. i'll get fired for sleeping on the job

  8. This post really made me laugh. It took me a minute to realize that day shift people don't get your jokes, they just makes sense to me. I have never worked the night shift but I could probably do it, I'm often up all night.

  9. I could never work nights, my BF used to and I hated it!

  10. Hah - thanks for the laughs. Sounds like the night shift is just perfect. Oh - and Heaven is totally my stripper name too! LOL!!!!

  11. I was just complaining to my daughter that when she moves away in a month there will be no one in my land of mid-western suburbia that "gets" me because I am so sarcastic and straight-faced and say such off the wall sh*! that people find awkward. I am so glad to find your blog so that when I am up late nights I can read your hilarious posts and feel "normal"! Thanks for being crazy :)

  12. Night shift is not for me. I can't sleep during the day. I need my 8 hours night sleep to feel fresh in the morning :) Stopping by from Hopalong Friday bloghop!
    The Twerp and I

  13. Yes, I totally agree to ALL of your points. & here's why: I, too, work a night shift (12 hrs. 6 p.m. to 6 a.m.) on the psych unit at a Women's Prison. ;)

  14. I have spent quite a bit of time in psychiatric hospitals because my son is schizophrenic (really). It's great you can have a sense of humor because you need it working there. I totally get your sense of humor-funny post!

  15. I TOTALLY get your sense of humor!! Love it, as a matter of fact.

    Is it odd that I'm intrigued by your job?

  16. Okay, I'm totally in with your sense of humour! And I think I have all of the qualifications for working the night shift. I'm in!

  17. Hahha, well oranges are better than carrots. That's just science.


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